Waiting for Baby Lorelei

I seriously was not going to post again until Lorelei arrived. After all, there's really becoming less and less to say the bigger and more tired I get.  These days we don't do very much besides hang out at home with the occasional play date. Fair warning:  This is fairly whiney and I really don't have much to say.  BUT, again…as this is like my journal, I am going to record things here that you may not care about.  Feel free to skip it ;) 

With the uncertainty of the due date and expecting a baby anytime between end of January-February 17th, there have been a lot of people wondering how I'm doing and feeling.  Truthfully, I've been better!! I'm anxious, huge, uncomfortable, and quite frankly, just getting frustrated. This pregnancy has been so different from when I was pregnant with Jimmie. 

With Jimmie, I didn't really know what to expect.  I anticipated the worst but also expected for him to show up a week or so after his due date.  Aside from heartburn and feeling pretty big, I had no signs that I was due any day and I was student teaching which kept me pretty busy and my mind occupied.  Never really had braxton hicks, and besides the occasional scare of "why is my baby not moving", everything was about as simple as it could be.  My water broke a week early and even THEN I wouldn't have guessed I should go to the hospital if my water hadn't broken.  I felt entirely normal.

This baby couldn't be farther from that.  Maybe I started to feel bigger and more tired this time because I chase around a 20 month old all day and I guess that will do it to you.  I've been ready to be done with this pregnancies and the headaches we've had with it since about 32 weeks :)  (No offense baby, we're just excited to meet you.) I don't think the huge due date range helped with the situation much since we've basically just been sitting on the edge of our seats for the last several weeks.  That's a lot of nights of finishing work and making sure the house is totally clean and ready to go in case I have to leave in the middle of the night.

But the most obnoxious thing has been within the last week. Prodromal Labor.  Ever heard of it?  Neither had I.  You hear about Braxton Hicks contractions and pre-labor, but never really this.  You can click on that link if you want a better explanation but basically what it is: labor that starts and stops for days on end.  It feels like real labor and IS real labor in a lot of ways except for the important one: It doesn't produce a baby at the end of it.  Waking up with painful, take-your-breath away contractions that are time-able and consistent. For hours on end.  Sometimes they progress and get closer together and sometimes not.  And then after house of pain and waiting….it just…stops.  Disappears. Makes you think it was all in your head.  Labor stalls and just stops.  Until (most likely) the next night when the same thing happens and you think FOR SURE it's gotta be this time! And then (normally around the same time), it just goes away…again.  

It's different from pre-labor because you don't have a baby within 12-24 hours. It's different from braxton hicks because these aren't sporadic, painless little contractions that can come and go or disappear with movement or water.  (Actually some of these contractions hurt MORE than anything I ever felt with Jimmie).  It can go on for days or up to several weeks.  Mine's been happening since last Friday (Jan 31).  I've known since 38 weeks that I'm 80-90% effaced and 2-3 cm dilated.  But even with all of those contractions and pain… nothing had changed.  BUT! I have been very lucky in the fact that I don't have terrible prodromal labor EVERY night consistently.  Some nights are worse than others. 

(Haha, sorry I realize that's kind of a creepy picture…but it cracked me up!)

It's really just more of an emotional game at this point.  Thankfully, because Jimmie is here (and can't come to the hospital at all, even just to check on things), I have been very patient about pulling the trigger and running to the hospital at every twist and turn.  Just kind of a roller coaster of emotions, but she will come when she's ready.  And if not… she will come on the 11th or 12th because that's when I'm going to be induced hopefully, haha!  

I'm grateful that she's doing well and hanging in there, I really am.  And I'm sure there will be times in the upcoming months that I will wish I were still pregnant because it's easier to do that than wrangle two little babies :) But for now I've decided that, for my sanity, it's okay to complain a little bit. 

Super grateful for my family and friends, near and far, that have been really encouraging and helpful :) Especially the ones who bear with me and hear every little update. Especially for Jim for being super patient and never complains at all despite my needing extra help, extra sleep, extra random food runs, and extra listening ears. He's been more supportive than I could ever ask for. 

For real, this will be the last post before having a baby.  At this point, we should only have 3 more full days until we go to the hospital.  Yay for baby!!